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Public News #18063
Date: 2009-03-18
From : Overlord Malifuus
To : Everyone
Subject : Where hath mine axe gone?

Sapience, I normally despise this public forum but I recently came across a half-charred letter while wandering the forests unbothered. It appears to be the account of an adventurer and I mean to share his warning with the whole of our population. The following is what I could make out: ---------------------------------------------- Hath anyone seen mine axe on the seventh of thy glorious Scarlatan? I was instructed by my wife, "Salifuum, you are so lazyeth, why don't you choppeth downeth some wood?" I replied, why madam, firstly you are an easy wench who reaketh of brothel and cabbage, secondly, you hath not given me loveth on thy own fortnight, how could you expect me to chop wood for thy fire? She then replied, "Go choppeth wood and thou shalt get thy loveth." Then I climbed upon my blood steed and found the nearest tree appropriate for my chopping. I threw mine axe at thy tree and to my dismay, the tree stood unstunned! Unstunned! It swallowed my axe whole and excretedeth it out to lands unknown, so I set upon a voyage to find mine axe. I went searching far and wideth for thine axe, could it be in Mog with the Mhun? Azdun with the goblins? Eleusis with the slow-minded and simple-witted folk? Nay! Nay! It was nowhere to be found! There was only one choice. To go asketh the most famouseth of all Sentinels, Spire of the fastaxeth tribe. I found Spire of the fastaxeth tribe and I asked "Spire, thine own city holds many axes and dull raced people who certainly don't have the mental capacity to hide mine axe, hath you seen it?" He gave me a harrowing reply. "No, Salifuum the handsome, I have not seen your axeth. In facteth MINE OWN AXE HATH ALSO been eaten!" Quoth the day where the axes of Sapience be gone from the hands of their most handsomest adventurers! Heed these words adventurer, the end times draw near! -Salifuum, The Handsome --------------------------------------------- Take these words as you will, I find this account of 'Salifuum' worrying at best. Walk In Evil -Malifuus Penned by my hand on the 1st of Scarlatan, in the year 504 AF.


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